Mother's Helper-Is it really happening?

It is! I can't believe it. They moved in today! As of Monday, Alea Bunker will be my full time "helper" around the house. For a few months now John and I have been discussing the idea of hiring someone to help me out with some of the responsibility around here right now. John just has so much going on outside of the house and I just seem to be getting further and further behind in my duties. And although in a lot of ways the idea sounded great, we didn't really have the money to hire someone. In fact, we were considering renting out our guest house to make a little extra money. Well, then John came up with the great idea of putting those two things together and hiring someone to work for us in exchange for a place to live. It sounded like the perfect solution on one hand, but I had kind of been dragging my feet about the whole thing for a few different reasons. First of all I have this idea in my head that I should be able to handle all of this on my own. My whole life I have dreamed of having a large family and being a stay at home mom who spent all day taking care of and loving her babies. Before having children, I just knew I could do it and be the kool-aid Mom type of person and the June Cleaver type of wife and all of that. Each of the children that we have has come after a lot of prayer and very clear answers that yes, it is time for another child. I know that they each have come when they were suppose to and that they are meant to be a part of this family. Ok, cleaning up (especially nasty bathrooms) after a house full of boys was never quite what I would picture in my dreams, but anyway, you get the idea. Besides that, I grew up in a house where my Mom always seemed to have everything under control. I know she will laugh at that statement, but that is how it seemed to me. She always had a full meal on the table that we ate as soon as my dad came home from work, and although our house was always full of "tidy piles", she kept the house relatively clean. I've only seen her cry 3 times in my entire life, and I never remember her ever asking anyone for help. Growing up I thought we had the greatest family and I wanted to be just like my Mom. What's funny is she is one person now who has been greatly encouraging me to get some help. Hmmm, maybe it wasn't as easy for her as she made it seem to my teenage mind! Anyway, so I know it is a pride thing, but it is REALLY hard to admit that I just plain can't keep up with everything that needs to be done right now, I can't do everything on my own and I really do need another set of hands to help with things around the house.

Another reason I wasn't so sure about the whole idea is that I am a pretty private person. It takes a long time for me to really open up and feel comfortable around a person. I like to have my space where I know I can be myself and feel comfortable. Luckily I finally met a man who took the time to get to know me and loves me anyway and kids, well, they are always so accepting and make you feel so good, at least when they are little. So my home is like my safe place. I didn't really like the idea of a total stranger living that close to us who would be so involved with our lives. I'm still not totally excited about this aspect of it, but hopefully it will all work out.

Finally, though a few weeks ago, two things happened that made me realize that this situation was in the best interest of my family and I needed to get over my pride and accept this opportunity that we are being given. First was when simple things like moping my floor, or lifting our son sent my body into crazy contractions that really made me worry that our daughter may be born too early. And second was when John got a part in the play and I realized that he will be at rehearsal Monday through Saturday throughout the entire month of June. Just a week after our baby is due. Other than Sundays, I really don't see him during this time. So a few weeks ago, we put an ad out on craigslist and sent it out through a friend's ward newsletter. Wow, we got some responses, but let's just say, not ones that made me feel instantly comfortable about having these people near my children. Then at Play try-outs John ran into Kenyen and Alea Bunker. We had known Kenyen's family from our first ward here in Queen Creek and John knew Alea a little bit from past plays that he has been in. Actually he introduced the two of them, and we attended their reception a few months back. Anyway, John mentioned to them that we were hoping to find a couple to move into our house in exchange for some help, and did they know anybody. Well, the Lord works in mysterious ways and come to find out, they did...themselves! So they came over the next day and we talked about what we were really looking for, and they basically knew. It's hard to explain, but it is like they have been being prepared for this for a few weeks now. After talking with them that night, they prayed about it, we prayed about it and we all feel good about the situation. Alea needed to give notice to her work, so we thought she would not be able to begin work until a week from Monday. Ends up that she was able to just change her schedule there to work on Saturdays and she can now start this Monday. It's truly a huge answer to prayers. It's going to be a big change and take some getting use to, but I am really excited about what this might mean and the relief that it might bring to my heart and mind in the upcoming months. Now maybe I will be able to be a little more like the Mom in my dreams and spend more time with my kids and have them know a Mom who is not constantly stressed out and frustrated. What's also great is that my kids, especially Jacob loved Alea instantly. I really am excited about this.